Reflections On Myself

So here I am. It's after 11:00 at night, on the last day of break, and what am I doing?

Trying to finish work for school I technically should have done several weeks ago.

Yeah, yeah, I know--bad idea. Believe me, I've heard it all before. You're reading words written by someone who registered for his college classes on Tuesday, January 3rd, when he received the paperwork before Thanksgiving break. I have a habit of minor procrastination. While we're on this topic, it's probably a good time to mention that I have yet to start the coursework for my online AP microeconomics course, all of which is due at the end of this month.

So...why? Why do I consistently do this to myself?

I'm not sure I know the answer. I do feel like I have an overdrive I can turn on when I need it. This summer, I sequenced most of the MIDI files (if you don't know what that is, it's sufficient to know that it's a lot of work) for a local production of The Producers within the space of a week by working from 6:00 A.M. to 11:00 P.M., with breaks only for marching band practices and for rehearsals for my own play, Annie. But, although I do sometimes enjoy cranking out work in this frenzied manner, after a while, it becomes somewhat tiresome.

Do I think I learn more or produce better work when the pressure to finish as quickly as possible is on me? Certainly not. I know that I am far less efficient when I am working like I am right now than I would be if I, as common sense would dictate.

Rarely, I will successfully map out a work schedule for myself, and stick to it, and get whatever it is I'm working on done ahead of time. And it is a nice feeling. But then, I'll lapse back into my old ways. So even though I've tried other solutions, I don't stick with them.

However, the more I think about it, the more I realize that I am, in some aspects, extremely self-motivated. I've engineered and worked on a massive trebuchet, developed a Beowulf cluster, performed some of the harder piano pieces ever written, and made first chair flute in our Allstate band (and believe me, I practiced ahead of time for that). I can work to achieve a goal...sometimes.

Looking through that list, the distinction is obvious: I work on what I want to work on, pushing aside that which bores me (and, let's be honest...compared to a ten foot tall trebuchet, what isn't boring?) for what grabs my attention. Some of my friends here in La Junta don't do this. They prioritize, thinking about what work's due date is closest and therefore should be done first.

Reread that last sentence. Think about it.

Graduating: It's Nice

Well, today, I had to make a few quick decisions, the long term effects of which will be, hopefully, my own high school graduation. To make a long story short, I was supposed to take our school's "World History" class this year, which is, if you want to be nit-picky about it, required for graduation. Somehow, I slipped through the cracks and this class was not on my schedule.

Today, in my monthly meeting with our district's GT advisor (which has, over the year, been christened "Nerd Lunch"), I pointed out this minor technicality and gave what I thought was the best solution. I felt that, since one of the seven classes I would be taking next year would be a class at our community college instead of one on our school's campus, I could then use the open hour this produced to take World History. Basically, I thought I could take eight classes in a day instead of the regular seven.

But of course it couldn't be that easy.

Instead, we ran into more and more scheduling conflicts, and eventually decided that the "best" outcome would be for me to take a "hybrid" course (which, being a different course, is theoretically far more rigorous than World History) through our community college--OJC. This means that, although it would primarily be an online course, I would also have occasional contact with the professor.

So, at this point, I have two main reactions:

Reaction 1:  What will this be like? 

Over the last year, I have learned an incredible amount simply by reading around various edublogs. I have started analyzing every moment I spend in a classroom to see if I am really learning. Of course, this may be getting to the point where it becomes a distraction--but it's a distraction I can live with because it is providing me with the tools I will need if I hope to, one day, be a halfway decent teacher.

Now, as I try out this new medium--a "hybrid" course--I'll be able to carry this newfound insight with me to see how effective it really is. It'll give me a firsthand chance to experience what I try and think about every day, and I'll be able to write about it without having to worry about hurting anyone's (read: a teacher's) feelings because I won't be "learning" from a teacher.

Reaction 2: Is this really the best way?

Bill Ferriter actually said pretty much everything I've been thinking in this post, but I'll go ahead and rehash it. Throughout the entire conversation, we were looking at what I absolutely had to get in before 2013--and it meant a lot of time spent in classes that would probably not be beneficial. Now, we did start to take steps in this direction--we're going to ask the department chair to waive the World History credit for the hybrid course.

But it's not far enough.

If we could keep going in this direction, somehow customizing the curriculum for each student's individual needs and preferences...that's when I think we could get some real work done.

Now, I recognize that, logistically, that's a borderline ridiculous statement. As far as I can see, there's no way to pull that off in a way where every student is in a class beneficial to them--after all, who gets to decide which classes are "beneficial"? Then, even if that could be worked out somehow, we'd have to find a way to actually create a schedule for which that actually worked.

Am I on to something, or am I just an idealistic idiot?